Can I Be a Surrogate? 5 Essential Requirements You Need to Know Before Applying
The decision to become a gestational surrogate is a profound act of kindness. It is a journey that changes lives—not just for the intended parents who finally get to hold their baby, but for the surrogate who experiences the unique pride of making that miracle possible.
If you have found yourself wondering, "Can I be a surrogate?" you are likely motivated by a deep sense of empathy and a desire to help others. However, because surrogacy involves complex medical procedures and legal protections, there are specific standards every applicant must meet. These requirements are designed to ensure your safety, the health of the baby, and the success of the entire process.
Here are the five essential requirements you need to know before you start your application.
1. A Proven Track Record of Healthy Pregnancies
One of the most important qualifications for becoming a surrogate is your obstetric history. To ensure that your body is physically capable of carrying a baby to term safely, agencies and fertility clinics require that you have already given birth to at least one child of your own.
Successful Deliveries: You must have a history of at least one full-term pregnancy and delivery without major complications.
Current Parenting: You should currently be raising at least one child in your home. This ensures that you understand the emotional and physical demands of motherhood.
Complication-Free History: Conditions such as preeclampsia, gestational diabetes requiring medication, or preterm labor in previous pregnancies may be disqualifying factors.
Limited C-Sections: Most clinics prefer surrogates who have had no more than three cesarean sections, though this can vary slightly by agency.
2. Meeting Specific Age and BMI Standards
Fertility and physical resilience are key to a successful gestational journey. Therefore, surrogates must fall within a specific age range and maintain a healthy weight.
Age Requirements: Generally, surrogate mothers must be between the ages of 21 and 40 (some agencies may accept healthy candidates up to age 43 if they have had a recent successful birth). This age bracket is chosen because it represents the peak years for a healthy, lower-risk pregnancy.
Body Mass Index (BMI): A healthy BMI is crucial for the effectiveness of the hormonal medications used during the IVF process. Most clinics require a BMI between 19 and 32. A BMI that is too high or too low can increase the risk of complications like hypertension or difficulties during the embryo transfer.
3. Physical and Mental Wellness
Surrogacy is a marathon, not a sprint. It requires you to be in excellent health, both in mind and body.
Physical Health: You must be a non-smoker and live in a smoke-free environment. You should also be free of untreated chronic conditions and have no history of substance abuse.
Mental and Emotional Stability: You will undergo a psychological screening to ensure you are emotionally prepared for the journey. This includes discussing your motivations and ensuring you have the emotional maturity to navigate the bond with the intended parents and the eventual birth.
Medication Guidelines: Candidates must not be currently taking certain medications, such as those for depression or anxiety, that are not compatible with pregnancy. Many agencies require you to be off these medications for at least 6 to 12 months before applying.
4. Financial and Lifestyle Stability
While surrogates receive generous compensation, it is vital that they are financially stable before starting the process. Surrogacy is an altruistic act, and agencies want to ensure that the compensation is a benefit, not a primary necessity for survival.
Financial Independence: Applicants should not be receiving government assistance (such as Section 8, SNAP, or TANF).
Support System: Having a "surrogacy village" is essential. Whether it is a partner, spouse, or close friends, you need a reliable support system to help with childcare, transportation to appointments, and emotional encouragement.
Legal Standing: You and any adults living in your household must have a clean criminal record to pass the background check phase.
5. Residency in a Surrogate-Friendly State
Surrogacy laws in the United States are handled at the state level, meaning your location matters just as much as your health.
Legal Protections: Most agencies only work with women living in "surrogate-friendly" states where legal contracts are enforceable and "Pre-Birth Orders" can be easily obtained. States like California, Nevada, and Illinois are known for having very favorable laws.
Restricted States: Currently, it is difficult or illegal to pursue compensated surrogacy in states like Nebraska or Louisiana. Your agency will help you determine if your state’s laws allow for a safe legal journey.
Why These Requirements Exist
It might feel like there are a lot of "hoops" to jump through, but every requirement serves a purpose. These standards protect you first and foremost. By ensuring you are healthy, stable, and legally protected, the surrogacy community creates an environment where you can focus on the joy of the experience rather than the stress of potential complications.
Becoming a surrogate is a life-affirming choice that creates an unbreakable bond between families. If you meet these criteria, you are already well on your way to beginning one of the most rewarding chapters of your life.
The Ultimate Guide to Becoming a Surrogate Mother: A Journey of Heart and Hope